John William Sterling Journal: January-June 1864

Continued from:

John William Sterling Journal: July-December 1863

Jan 4, 1864 I am seated at the table in the dining room at home with Sarah at my left hand performing examples in addition. Mother laying on the lounge sleeping off her sick headache, which has not gone worse from her visit to New Haven. Father in the rocking chair by the fire with his usual occupation of the evening, which seems to be silent thought. I do hate to begin this new year. I meant to say page, for it reminds me of the new year which I have just commenced. I am sorry to enter upon the duties of this year because in it terminates my college course and with it all those blessed associations which hover about Senior year and college life. It will truly be an eventful year. It will decide my destiny for time -- what profession or occupation I shall adopt I must choose before the last sand has run out from the annual glass of “decaying time.” I am anticipating great pleasure from this year because I am expecting to improve and I have arrived at that stage of my life where the greatest worldly pleasure I desire [is] from the consciousness of self-improvement and discipline. At the last meeting of last term, I was elected President by acclamation at the motion of Stocking of ‘65 that the “by-laws should be suspended &c” Mat. was (Mat Borden) elected Vice President. I luckily escaped from a speech. Linonia sent into the Brothers a committee inviting us to listen to an oration by Fitch of ‘64, which our Society accepted. When the time arrived, I of course went first and occupied the chair of the Vice President of the Linonia. The speech or oration was certainly a miserable affair in a miserable subject. As soon as the oration was concluded, I with becoming dignity descended the stage and having proceeded to a place between the desk and door, made a nice little speech upon the advancement of eloquence in both of the Societies, the healthy rivalship in each and the fine oration which was an index of their improvement and culture. Of course it was not in this language, but was neatly expressed. I tumbled of course, but not nearly as much as on former occasions. It is easy to see I am rapidly improving. The Examination of last term was unprecedentedly hard. We were required to go into 6 examinations in 4 days and most of the studies required justly a day and a half apiece. Cramming late nights and early mornings almost ruined my eyes. We had one of the most slippery and sleety and disagreeable days and nights I have ever witnessed. On Thursday night Creed[?] fell down and nearly broke his arm. The doctor was at hand. Clarke and I assisted him. I had a most pleasant Christmas. Christmas Eve I accompanied Henry to the Episcopal Church from which we came away after the address and during the distribution of the cornucopias hanging from the tree. Parson Wesson did not impress me very favorably. I had the pleasure of hanging up the stockings on the suspended line. On Christmas morning, I found in or attached to my stocking, a silver pencil case from Kate. Mitchell Geography from Mother, Artevelde[?] from Cordelia, and The Art of Extemporaneous Speaking from myself, which idea was thought rather eccentric. Father received from me a chemical household book which is very interesting. He received a paperweight I think from Mother. Mother received a silver pie knife from her children. Kate received from Mother a photographic album, from Cordelia ________________, from Mother a gold pen and from myself a book, “The Everyday Philosopher.” Cordelia received a knife from me, a set of earrings and breastpin from Mother. Chester (Wooster) received a nice pair of sheepskin mittens from Mother. Sarah also received something nice. So did Henry. I gave each about a pound of candy (after family ate the rest). I went skating seven or eight times during the vacation, most of which were solitary as the boys and girls were in school. Fresh[?] pond was frozen splendidly for a few days, but the skating was soon spoilt here as elsewhere by the excessive snow.

Jan 18, 1864 I spent one night in Bridgeport at Aunt Cornelia’s where I met 2 Knapp girls. I had a very interesting and generally prosperous fortune told me by them. It was the original intention to sit out the old year in the church, but it rained and snowed so violently that this was impracticable. I had a very comfortable and pleasant time. In the afternoon of Jan 1st I walked home alone on the railroad, singing, thinking, and yelling. When I reached home I found Mr. Sedgwick in the dining room talking with Father. I enjoyed their company until I was called into the South Parlor by Jimmie Mitchell, with whom I called upon Miss Lindsley in the evening, when she held reception for all her gentleman acquaintances. There were several young ladies who were helping her in entertaining company. She had a very nice table set in the corner. It is needless for me to say that I found her very agreeable. I did a good deal of business for Father this vacation in collecting his dividends, processing Bills of Exchange through Geo. Burroughs Cash of Bridgeport Bank. I also got all of his houses reinsured and took out a new policy for Mother’s house. I returned to New Haven on Wednesday the 6th of Jan, meeting Clint in the cars, whom I had left sick in the room laying in my bed in front of the fire, with warm bottles which I had filled with warmer water, with all of the symptoms of the Fever and Ague, which he had in last summer vacation. I had called the doctor (Ives) and had procured his prescription. He was taken very sick in a very short time indeed. I left him in the care of Parke and Thomas and the doctor whom he knew. If he had been growing worse and was not an intimate friend of the doctor’s family, I should have staid. He was better in 2 days and so much so that he went to Philadelphia on Thursday. As soon as I left the depot, I went down to see Cordelia and found her very happy apparently. I then proceeded to my room which I found cold and everything disarranged and not set in order as old Smith’s nigger had been commanded.

[Transcriber Note: When Sterling's journal was written, the "N word" was not the pejorative word it today has become. By the 1900s, it had become that. It is interesting to note that the James O. Bloss's family was very much abolitionist and involved in the Underground Railroad in Rochester, NY. Bloss, during his time with Sterling, was involved in humanitarian causes.]

Jan 16, 1864 I went to the cars this morning to meet Kate and a Miss Roberts who is staying at Mr. Sedgwick’s. I had a very nice chat with them at the depot and left them as they were starting for Mrs. Roberts’ to go to Tuttle and Monhouse in order to engage printing for the Brothers Prize Debate, into which I would have gone had it not been necessary for me to work in vacation and worry the whole time over it. Last Wednesday, although suffering with a terrible cold, I still presided at the meeting of the Brothers in Unity with dignity as I hope to profit as I know to myself.

Jan 20, 1864 Today I took out a leave of absence for 6 days. It is almost impossible for me to recover here in New Haven. It is so damp and while I go to Recitation and subject myself to the change of heat and cold, I ought not expect to get well.

Jan 22, 1864 I went home today (Friday). It did seem as if I were better as soon as I trod upon the threshold of my paternal mansion.

Jan 27, 1864 I returned from home today, much better but still with a tremendous cold still clinging about me. Prof. Northrop made a splendid speech in the Brothers in which he advocated turning each society into a legislative body &c. He advocated because 1st it was a new thing and was adapted in that account to awaken interest, 2nd because it would practice each and all in Parliamentary Law, 3dly, in order to give everyone an opportunity to debate and speak upon the question which he had advanced. The Hall was crowded -- Linonia had been invited in -- both Societies were resolved into a Committee of the Whole. One or two little things were rather imparliamentary in my actions, but they seemed to slip along all right, although I was being resolved and fast resolved too into a lump of sweat through anxiety and care[?]. Among the speakers were H.P. Boyden and Dryden of the Junior Class, the latter of whom made some unfortunate analogy thus introducing the word windmill. In a moment Cyrus sprung to his feet and with dignity and enthusiasm and terrible earnestness he so brought out the idea of windmill that Dryden was very glad to sink in insignificance and discomfiture upon the floor. This second speech of Cyrus’ was splendid. After the “Committee rose” a sharp discussion arose between Mat and Battershall in regard to the amendment of the latter upon the motion of the former. Mat would not accept of it because he thought it meant the same thing. I have been excused from making up my lessons although I shall have to make them up to myself.

Feb 2, 1864 Yesterday I met Cordelia at the depot on her return from home where she had been spending Sunday. On Saturday I had put her aboard of the cars and had become acquainted with Miss Wilson, the assistant, whom I accompanied to Mrs. Roberts’ where she arrived just as old [name illegible] was leaving the gate. He would not return however and so she lost her music lesson, a pretty bold thing on the part of this old “file”, I should think.

May 2, 1864 I have just returned from home after having spent a delightful vacation of three weeks. Cordelia was with me. She went to Mrs. Roberts’ to commence her second term. I have spent the vacation somewhat differently than usual. A great part of my time I have been working quite hard on my Townsend. Kate has helped me wonderfully. I went to New York a week ago last Wednesday evening and staid until Saturday, spending the two nights with Thomas. Thursday morning I reached the city and I went down on the Bridgeport boat. I had an interview with Hamlin and again on Friday. He made a few corrections, fewer by far than I had expected. I had a very pleasant time flirting with a Miss Croswell and Miss Minnie[?], the back of whose house faces diagonally Thom’s. We went over and called on our way to New York on Friday evening, which we spent in running around in a rather loose manner. Through Thom’s introduction I procured a suit or rather cloth for a suit of clothes at wholesale price (16.78), 22.50 being added to the sum will give the amount they will cost me when made up. It makes a very handsome and cheap suit. Wakeman and Johnson of Bridgeport are making my coat and pants. Mother hires Mrs. Deforest to make my vest. I can not here recite minutely about the row which I shook the college world to its very center during the middle and last part of last term. It was a row between Darling and Gregory with the other three members of the board, Geo. Merriam, Doug. Miller and Mat. Borden. Darling had written a sarcastic piece against H.P. Boyden without the knowledge of the Lit. Board. Mat was in New York at the time, but Doug, knowing what his opinion was after consulting with Geo. Merriam, took the responsibility of going to 34 S.M. and taking all the remaining Lits., about 250 in all (a little more than half). Darling demanded them. Doug called a meeting of the Board, which Lyman in place of Gregory attended. Darling was present. They passed a resolution over the heads of D. and L. to have the piece taken out and to ask Darling to write another and provided he refused, to have it bound up and distributed. They then tore out the piece and burned it up in the faces of D. and L. Darling called a class meeting at which he spouted at great length.

[Transcriber Note: Several lines appear to be blanked out of the journal]

May 12, 1864 Last night I finished copying my would-be Townsend. How near I shall come succeeding I can not tell. Not a soul around I have written with the exception of my chum, to whom I read the piece. Twenty years old today! It is hard to believe this -- how old -- in the twenties -- how solemn -- before these next ten years shall have passed if Providence preserves my life, how much of my character will have been indelibly formed. Now all is prospect. Then, a good deal will have been realized. I am looking for success in law. How much must come before this. I expect to mourn the deaths of friends and relatives, but how many. Twenty years old. How little done. A man. How little do I deserve the name. Often I have said I would like to get married at twenty-eight. How fortunate in business, to say the least, I will have to be to accomplish this. Too many things press upon me for expression here. I cannot portray or define them all. Mother and Kate have written me two very fine letters. This day will be a great one in history. The war leaves memorials everywhere. This has been a most bloody and cruel day.

May 16, 1864 This morning I was taken suddenly with the mumps. I employed Dr. Shiff. He thinks I caught them from a young Southgate, a Sophomore down on the first floor, whom I do not remember as having passed even.

[Transcriber Note: Mumps viral infections in adolescent and adult males carry an up to 30% risk that the testes may become infected (orchitis or epididymitis), which can be quite painful; about half of these infections result in testicular atrophy, and in rare cases sterility can follow.]

May 20, 1864 It is now Friday and I am still badly swollen -- and entirely un-crammed for tomorrow’s Biennial on Logic. I shall be obliged to omit it to my great disappointment. I have been so faint and weak I have been laying down until now since I was 1st taken sick. I have eaten only 4 slices of toast since Monday, not a very large quantity for a man of my build and habits. John Creed, Esq. was buried today. His pallbearers were Geo. Russell, Jimmie Dwight, Prof McWhorter, Harry Babcock.

[Transcriber Note: This is Sterling’s second mention of Creed. He is not listed as a classmate.]

There were fourteen fellows following. I wish I had been able to accompany. Geo. Merriam brings me my meals consisting of tea mostly. My mumps, which by the way is a ridiculous, a perfectly [illegible] disease, are decreasing slightly on the left and under the throat.

Continued at:

John William Sterling Journal: July-October 1864

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